Thursday, December 20, 2007

Only 247 Things Left To Do Before Tomorrow

Just when you think you're done with the Christmas get ready. Sniggly little loose ends are cropping up left and right and in my email; and not all at once. I forgot the preschool teachers. There are 4 of them. I forgot Mrs. Sixth Grade. I remembered Mrs. Second Grade due to a highly organized room mom who was all over that shit weeks ago. You know what? I'm not going to list it all because it would bore you to death. To DEATH!

But I did have to pick up a book for Boy-Child#1's class gift exchange. Simple enough. Enter Barnes and Noble and be back in the car in ten minutes depending on the crowd inside. Easy. The book had to be 6th grade reading level or higher. And due to the fact that my oldest son is at that age where he is highly sensitive to what his peers think about him; his taste in literature cannot appear too feminine, too flaming, or worse, too young. It couldn't be girly. It couldn't have chicks on it (no, not the feathery or downy kind -hey, you know what? It couldn't have those on it either), no pink, nothing girl-themed. No horseys, no ponies. No cuteness and on the other end of the spectrum; no morbidity. It also couldn't be Harry Potter anything because that has been done to death. It couldn't be Star Wars related either because apparently that is passe.
[and I just died a little bit inside relaying that info -Han Solo was my first true love]
I had to either already know the story myself or be able to decipher from the jacket its contents because if there turned out to be any kind of sex or anything inappropriate in this book, I didn't want some mom stalking me with all her questions pertaining to "WTF"?! Which is also why, when I picked up a book that caught my eye and I thought would do until I saw etched in the bottom right corner "From the Author of The Golden Compass"; the controversy surrounding the mere mention of the title started to burn the flesh from my hands, I threw it as far away from my person as possible. In other words. I totally over thought this thing. Forty-five minutes later I walk out with: Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightening Thief. I was pleased with my choice.

This morning, after dropping the boys off at school; the book nicely wrapped for the gift exchange and tucked in Boy-Child#1's backpack, it occurs to me that in the picture depicted on the cover of said book: is a boy standing in the ocean armed with a sword and appears to be heading to Manhattan. I scold myself: "Have you just completely lost all sense? Did you really just send your own son to school with that book and here we are in a post 9-11 world?! A sword wielding child on his way to ground zero? What the hell is wrong with you, you loopy bitch?" (sometimes I'm extremely harsh with myself) Then I told myself to sit by the phone and wait for a call from the principal. Or the FBI. Because as you can see; I'm over thinking this again.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

We stopped giving gifts to teachers after 2nd grade. Call me Scrooge, but what exactly do teachers do with 20+ presents each Christmas and June?

Anonymous said...

LOL, I forgot to say that I love your choice in books. Who cares if he's about to attack a major city? (It doesn't look like NYC to me :-) ) It's the content that counts and the fact that he's on a mission!

Madame Queen said...

Entirely overthinking, but I would have done the same. Heck, I have a hard time picking out a book for MYSELF, much less other people!!

JCK said...

I can never get out of a bookstore in 10 minutes, unless I know the exact book I'm getting.

So, I got my nephew "The Lightening Thief." My sister gave me that as a wish list option. And so you have it...:)

Oh, and just got all the preschool teachers a pretty candle. I put 9 in my basket and 8 made it home. Such luck! &*()^%!!

Karen said...

I think giving books is a genious idea.

I skipped the preschool staff this year in the gift giving scheme. I was unsure of how many helpers and teachers were actually there and couldn't take the chance of forgetting anyone. They didn't egg me when I picked up Micah yesterday so I think I may be good.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Thanks Sea!

I can't believe we got the same book, JCK!

Yes, the gift giving is getting a bit out of control. And it's not only the teachers getting 20+ gifts from students; the STUDENTS are giving each other gifts too. Usually in the form of a goody bag and such but my kids come home with their backpacks overflowing.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Oh, I meant to add that I ended up getting all the teachers little bags of Ghiradelli chocolates, slapped a bow and tag on them and called it a gift.