Thursday, July 31, 2008

It's Like That Dream Where You're Back in High School, Naked, and Can't Remember Your Locker Combination

Yesterday I was pouring over and filling out the literature that was sent home this summer for Boy-Child#1's junior high school registration that is coming up next week. Yesterday was not a good day for me, emotionally, to be taking on such an endeavor. I was all PMS-y. But, as any PMSing woman knows, you can't talk yourself out of these things when you're in that state. At least not without a heavy dose of Prozac. So when I started having a mild panic attack, I kept telling myself that I was fretting over nothing, dammit! I was irrationally worried about Boy-Child#1 not being able to figure out his locker combination in gym class and picturing the rest of the guys standing around like, "Dude, what's wrong with you?". And then I'd tell myself, uh, yeah, everyone has been able to figure that out. But still my heart was beating a wee too fast and my breath was coming a little too quick. Then I got to the class schedule. What monster organized this:

REGULAR BLOCK SCHEDULE - ROTATING PERIODS

  • Monday, 8/18 Per. 3, 5, 1
  • Tuesday, 8/19 Per. 4, 6, 2
  • Wednesday, 8/20 Per. 5, 1, 3
  • Thursday, 8/21 Per. 6, 2, 4
  • Friday, 8/22 Per. 1, 3, 5
WTF, school district? Then I passed out. I don't know about you but when I attended junior high, we went to each class, each day. Periods 1-6. At the same hour every-freaken-day. But this? This takes a day planner, an atlas, and a Texas Instruments calculator to figure out where you need to be, at which hour, on any given day. This makes those nightmares I have where I'm back in school, but somehow my current age, with a project due, that's incomplete, in a class I can't find, with my notes in a locker whose combination I've long forgotten along with my pants, seem like a sweet dream. It's like someone had that dream and said, "I'll show those little punks. My subconscious messed with the wrong school administrator!" And you know it's a kattywompus schedule when during the orientation you're assured that "the kids pick up on it really quickly; it's the parents who have difficulty with it". You think? Except that at the orientation they didn't actually SHOW us the schedule. Which was probably intentional because they'd have a multi-purpose room full of dead parents. Or parents suddenly stricken with fear induced comas stuck in a perpetual nightmare with this schedule to contend with.

And to think I was worried about a lil' 'ol gym locker combination. Godspeed, Boy-Child#1. May the force be with you.

45 comments:

Eve Grey said...

Um, where you really up at 4am?! I was cursing myself for waking up 15min. b4 my alarm at 7. Poor boy-child number 1, may the force be with him indeed. Oh, i did that meme.

Suburban Correspondent said...

Yes, that block scheduling is the most f---ed up idea since...since...skimpy swimsuits. Not only does it leave kids sitting in class too long each day (I mean, how much can you learn in one sitting, really?); it means that if you miss a day of school, you've missed 2 classes worth of material in math or whatever instead of 1. I feel sorry for teachers coping with keeping junior high age kids interested for a full 90 minutes or more.

Anonymous said...

I don't understand it at all. But it looks very scary.
I remember when I went to high school we did have a crazy schedule, which they made us figure out at the beginning of the year and write out in different color markers for each class. With pretty borders and all.
Seriously. I still got lost all the time.

Madame Queen said...

Holy crap! They instituted block scheduling at my old school, but it was long after I left those hallowed halls. Can you imagine two hours of math class, though? UGH!

But the school's probably right. He'll have it figured out in no time.

Texasholly said...

Maybe the schedule IS the locker combination.

Anonymous said...

I feel the same way...My extreamly shy boy will be starting middle school with NO FRIENDS...we moved last year, and he just didn't connect with anyone...So that, with the new schedual (which changes every 6 weeks!!) and locker, and riding to school...AAARRRR...Maybe I should just home school and save me the stress...

Threeundertwo said...

LOL at the schedule is the locker combination.

At our middle school, they have A days and B days, and A weeks and B weeks. The kids picked it up instantly. I never did. And I'm a substitute.

I have those bad dreams about college. Finals week and I forgot to attend the class. *shudder*

Briya said...

Yah, my boy had block scheduling when I lived in Boston. They get it right away, I never could figure it out and eventually just had to believe he knew what he was doing.

Anonymous said...

Our jr. high also has block schedule, and apparently the teachers and the kids love it. Enough time to finish an entire science lab, enough time to get homework done, and the kids are really saavy about knowing where to go and what to do.

Remember, these are the toddlers who figured out how to program the VCR (remember those?), and who can text message while skateboarding.

We have difficulty ordering a margarita and taking our eyes off the waiter's crotch. I'm just SAYIN'. The kids can handle it.

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

So like what? They are in 3 classes for like 2 hours each day? My COLLEGE ENGINEERING LABS weren't that long for chrissakes! I don't get this.

KEEP BELIEVNG

Marmarbug said...

Um, that scedule made me throw up in my mouth a little.
Tell your young grasshopper to go with the force and be strong.

Anonymous said...

Is that a normal schedule now? Wow. I would have to have the thing laminated to my handy-dandy trapper keeper for the entire semester. I thought I was the only one with dreams about a project due and I couldn't find the class...

Burgh Baby said...

When I first saw that thingy, without having read the post yet, I thought you were sharing your Aunt Flo tracking scheme. I think it would make more sense used that way.

Hair Bows & Guitar Picks said...

WTF? Looks to scary for me - I have a couple more years till this...Thank God!

Anonymous said...

That's like a college schedule. When I was in high school, we had a rotating schedule where only periods 1-3 and 8-9 rotated. Periods 4-7 always remained same time (because they were lunch periods). So, whatever you had period 1 one day, you had that for period 2 the next day. Whatever you had for period 9 one day, you had first the next day. It made it so that a teacher wasn't suffering through teaching Trig to a classfull of zombies everyday at 8am and so that teachers didn't get the same group of kids for the same class at the end of the day. It *was* tough to wrap your brain around it, but once you started doing it, it was fine. That was high school though, not middle school!

Blah, blah, blah...a lurker w/o a blog

Anonymous said...

I is confused ;)

Madge said...

when i was a kid i had dreams about being late for the first day of school. now i have that dream for my kids. and every year it gets more complicated (going to school, not the dreams).....

Anonymous said...

Don't get me started on block scheduling. That has done more to decimate school band/choir/orchestra programs than pretty much anything else. Ticks me off to no end.
When I was in high school, we had mod scheduling. And if anyone reading here has had that scheduling, you know how effed up it can be. And how awesome. Having 15 minutes free in the middle of the school day? I could go to the bathroom and not have to dash off! I could swing by the library! I could go down to the cafeteria for a snack! Or, as I always did, I could go hang out in the band room. Once a band geek, always a band geek. ;)

scargosun said...

I was SO scared about my locker when I got to high school. I never had one and I was bad with combo locks. If I got it, he can get it.

Live.Love.Eat said...

Oh goodness. I never heard of this. Soon I will be fretting over when my 4yo has to go to his new school year after next to start kindergarten. I guess I have a little while to go before the Block sched. That does seem silly.

Kim said...

WOW going to school in August seems so foreign to me - we always go back after labor day. But we only get off the end of June.

Laural Out Loud said...

I had a a block schedule for middle school, but the numbers were IN ORDER. And with your son's, it looks like periods 1, 3 and 5 get a whole extra day? What about 2, 4 and 6? On our fifth day, we just had all of the classes for a shorter time.

I survived, but look at my brain now. It's not doing so great.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

One day, that's all it takes them. I've sent 4 kids through middle school and I still never figured it out. But then, I didn't need to!

Karen said...

What kind of crack were they smoking when they came up with that schedule? And will they be letting the children smoke it too so that they can understand it?
May the force be with him is right!

MommyTime said...

OMG Standing Still has me laughing out loud on my couch. That schedule is seriously the most facocked thing I've ever seen. Also, which lucky classes get 6 hours per week, while the others only get four? I'll bet it drives those teacher BATTY to have to adjust their lesson plans to try to do 3/2 the work in 2/3 the time. Or whatever the math for that is.

Unknown said...

This is too funny. We had block scheduling in high school but junior high? I guess that he will get used to it.

Swirl Girl said...

And, I thought 4th grade was going to be tough.

You need an abacus and a protractor to figure out the middle school schedule.

AutoSysGene said...

LOL! I still have nightmares about my school schedule and locker combination. 20 freaking years later. I can't imagine going through that all over agin!

I think I'm sleeping through Hope going to high school.

A Mom Two Boys said...

THAT just made my head hurt. I can't even imagine having to figure that out.

My thoughts are with Boy Child #1. And also with you.

EatPlayLove said...

When I taught fifth grade and my kids were terrified at the thought of middle school, I would remind them (and now you):

Everyone is starting Jr. High for the first time (well except for the mean older punks), they are all in it together. He may get lost, his friends may get lost, but eventually it won't seem to big and scary.

Before you know it, he'll know the place and their wacky schedule like the back of his hand.

AGSoccerMom said...

My sons first day of jr high school I got mobbed. I went because he wanted help with his locker. OMG the kids didn't get it. They were hollering this sucks, mine is broken. And, one by one I opened them up. Just remind him to spin it in between codes and if he messes up spin it 3 times to erase what you did. That was the part they got stuck on. My kids didn't have that crazy schedule but did have a day planner they handed out called a "binder reminder". If they don't give him one, buy one that single thing saved us. They were required to write any assignments in there and when they were due, for themselves and their parents.

Anonymous said...

How does that schedule even work?

Anonymous said...

Oh man, those poor kids. I despise the block schedule and the modified block schedule and the split block schedule and the bipolar hybrid block schedule. Actually, I think I made that last one up.

Anonymous said...

OK, so if it's the FIRST class of the day, on the FIRST day of the week, why IN THE WORLD is it called period THREE? Was ONE just too obvious a choice? Why not call them periods Clock, Glove, Cake Mix, and Doorknob? It wouldn't be as confusing. And why do they rotate order? Do they think that if they confuse the kids, that will keep them from making out in the hallways and knocking each others books to the floor? How many teachers show up to class prepared for the wrong group of kids? I certainly would. :-)

Anonymous said...

Actually, I think this is the sign of a rockin' awesome junior high school. Teachers and kids drool over this block type of scheduling because it cuts way back on wasted time and homework and reviewing and, well, I wouldn't know because we have the same schedule you had in school (based on collegiate Carnegie units, blah, blah, blah) and it rots.

Tell your son that Mrs. Thatsthewayitis says that he is going to a school run by very smart people, and he will love it (even if you don't). tee hee

Cookin' Mama said...

Oh sweet mothah. I just mentioned junior high in a blog and that made me a little sick...then to see this? Yikes. Poor boy-child #1. Much luck to him!

Indy said...

Just reading this is freaking me out. I swear my pulse increased.

Gretchen said...

Don't worry - I'm sure your son is super smart and will master the schedule right away.

I taught at a school with 8 class periods, only we only taught 6 classes a day. The day was divided into morning classes (A,B,C,D) and afternoon classes (E,F,G,H). The lunches were called X,Y,Z. The classes rotated and dropped one morning class each day and one afternoon class each day. Also, the lunch period rotated according to whaever the student's first afternoon class way. Here's how it went: day 1- class A, B, C, then lunch, then E, F, G. day 2 - class B, C, D, then lunch, then F, G, H. day 3- C, D, A, then lunch, then G, H, E. etc. Okay so lunches rotated this way: week 1-X lunch goes first, then Y lunch, then Z lunch. Week 2 - Y lunch goes first, Z lunch goes second, etc. etc. You figured out when to go to lunch depending on what was the first afternoon class you had that day. So, for example, you might actually go to class like this: B, C, D, F(split), lunch, f (Second half), G, H.

I have no idea how this cockamamie idea ever got approved. You may think I'm making this up but I'm not. I taught at Ursuline Academy in St. Louis. I think they still do it the same way today.

My point is this: Every girl, even the freshmen, had it mastered by the end of September. Because they do it every day. If they get confused, they just find a friend who's in their class and say, "Do we go to lunch now? Or homeroom? Or what?" Friends are good that way.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Texan mama~ My brain hurts.

Amy said...

That's seems pretty FUBAR'd if you ask me. Luckly we still have regular 1-6 periods every day here on the east coast.

(Well wait a minute - maybe we don't - it's been a while and my kids aren't there yet....)

dkuroiwa said...

Okay...so really....WHAT?
can't. concentrate. still trying to. figure. out. that. schedule.
Obviously, it DOES take a rocket scientest to do stuff at junior high!!

Anonymous said...

They had a similar schedule when my kids were in school. My older daughter literally never knew what day of the week it was....

Lynn - the piggy bank painter said...

OMG! I've had that same dream....except maybe the naked part. Except now I'll probably have the naked part. Thanks.

And I've never seen scheduling like that. Good luck.

Anonymous said...

The high school I work at keeps trying to do this. I don't even know that I'd be able to figure out what to teach on a regular basis. I can't imagine trying to figure it out as a kid. Because the raging hormones apparently aren't confusing enough.

Wineplz said...

What the hell? That's a school schedule? does it change the following week so that periods 6,2, and 4 are on MWF, and periods 3,5, and 1 are on TTh?