Monday, February 18, 2008

I Spy With My Little Eye

Girl-Child made an observation yesterday that I really wished she'd kept to herself. We stood in line at the grocery store behind a woman who, I would guess, was close to fifty. Or, she just spent a way too much time sun worshiping in her lifetime. [note to self: remain out of the sun. You're doin' great! Keep it up! That could be YOU!] Her wardrobe selection, however, was hardly pushing twenty. She wore skin tight skinny jeans with jewel embellished rear pockets. These were tucked into her furry knee high boots. A jeweled gold belt slung around her waist. A peppermint pink long sleeved shirt worn with a somewhat busy vest. Then there was, of course, the hat. It was sort of newsboyish. But not. I also would like to go on record as saying that any one of these items are fine. When worn on their own. It was all just too-much too much. I'm not even going to discuss the hair and makeup. It just doesn't matter. Girl-Child pipes up with, "That lady looks like Hannah Montana". I'm rendered totally speechless. She said it quite audibly and the woman definitely heard. [It wasn't like last week when she whispered in a voice only dogs could hear, asking me if the very flamboyant gentleman who rang up my purchases in the beauty supply store was a 'girl' or a 'boy'.] So I'm standing there trying to figure out how to answer my daughter. And my hesitation only prompted her to repeat herself. "Mommy? Did you hear me? THAT LADY LOOKS LIKE HANNAH MONTANA!". To Girl-Child, this is a compliment. To a fifty year old woman who may not have been striving for that look, it's probably not. I answered the only way one can in that situation. A faint and disinterested "mmmhmmm..."

18 comments:

Burgh Baby said...

If she's dressed like that, she probably thought it was a compliment. Girl-Child rocks!

Madame Queen said...

I swear, BBM took the words right out of my mouth!

Mutton dressed as lamb...good Lord please deliver me from such a fate!

Karen said...

Kids have an interesting way of mortifying parents in public. It's part of our training for insanity I think. But in her defense, I agree with you. To Girl-Child it was totally a compliment.

Like the time I was old enough to know better (like 10 or 12) and was at a local newly-opened pizza joint. Their prices were exceedingly reasonable (even to a kid) and I proclaimed loudly on purpose so that they'd hear in the back that "this place is CHEAP."

AutoSysGene said...

Ack! One of those times you wish the floor would open up and swallow you, huh?

Here's mine. While we were waiting for our house to be built we lived in a hotel for 5 weeks. During that time it was the first time Hope had ever seen an African American child and proceeded to ask me, "Mommy, why is that boy made out of chocolate?"

How do you answer that one....

Paula Lynn Johnson said...

That lady should count herself lucky. Reminds me of the time my son saw a guy in a bright orange long-sleeved shirt and said: Look! A Wiggle!

JCK said...

Girl-Child is AWESOME! Yes, we live near L.A. LMAO These moments are good to self congratulate oneself, I say snidely.

Anonymous said...

Obviously, you are raising the Girl-Child with good taste. The comparison of a 50-something dressed like THAT was spot-on. Way to go. And, frankly, if she's THAT out of touch with what is really "what to wear" at age 50 (could we have a few more episodes with Stacey and Clinton, humm?), then she couldn't possibly be bothered to hear something THAT helpful.

Badness Jones said...

ROFL! Out of the mouths of babes...I wish I could get away with saying things like that!

Jennifer S said...

Oh my, that was hilarious. Sounds to me like the woman in question was kinda asking for it.

Michelle Hix said...

Mosied on over from Jen's place (never a dull moment) and I think I'll stay a while!

Don Mills Diva said...

She calls 'em like she sees 'em!

Tootsie Farklepants said...

It's unanimous! The "That's what she was going for's" have it!

Melissa~ I would probably freeze on the spot. I mean, I have a good answer for it but it would be one of those "why didn't I say THAT THEN" moments.

Welcome Michelle Hix! Thank you!

Nora said...

I think your response was perfect :-)

Anonymous said...

At least she did not say she looked like a worn out hooker.

-Stu

Texasholly said...

hahaha. it is something she needed to hear, but her girlfriends wouldn't say it.

Anonymous said...

I dunno...I bought some BBW hootchie jeans the other day, and danged if ain't gonna wear 'em! Like I told the gal behind the counter...there's no hiding my big booty so I might as well put it out there! lol I SO will probably be that old lady...but with more sunscreen.

Anonymous said...

I think that's freaking hilarious. The woman soooooo obviously deserved that comment. Sounds like she needs to hang out with Stacey and Clinton.

Wineplz said...

that is hysterical!