Monday, May 26, 2008

It's Official: She's a Chick


On Friday evening Mr. Farklepants and the boys headed out to his brother's house for a weekend of blow your mind guitar jamming [insert devils horn hand gesture here and bang your head]. He lives in a more rural area that allows for atom splitting decibels. They're going to Christen the new amp [and probably utilize some wah-wah pedals]. Far away from my ears. And our neighbors ears. And the ears trapped in the folds of 17,000 pages of our homeowners association manual [Stepford isn't even kidding about RULES]. At some point in our harried good-byes, Girl-Child realizes that their trip requires a suitcase. And that she isn't going. While she hugged her oldest brother good bye, somewhere deep in her posterior lobe of the pituitary, a surge of oxytocin - the bonding hormone - was released. And with it? An ass-load of tears. As she held him in a kung-fu death grip, she managed to sob "I'm going toooo miiiiiiiiisssss yooooouuuu". See, it wasn't so much that she wasn't going with them that had her all acting like a girl; it was that they weren't going to be with HER. This reaction was so unlike her. Sure she's a little more sensitive than our boys and easier to upset, especially if she's in trouble, but she's just not terribly emotional. Because I have witnessed other little girls her age and I'm like, "Are you serious with this? Oh my stinkin' heck, get over yourselves already. DRAMATIC much?" -see how empathetic I am? Who's looking for a nanny? So it was completely uncharacteristic and bizarre that she just didn't know what she was gonna dooooo without "her guys". And all of my suggestions about what we can do over the weekend as just us girls was not filling the void. It took a solid 30 minutes to talk her down and by that time I'd convinced myself that she was PMSing and going to start her period in three days. Right around the time I was wondering if they made Midol for children under the age of five and thinking that they should -and if not, then what was the proper dosage of the adult version to administer which was forcing me to do math- Dora the Explorer came on and Boots started singing about how he "speaks Spanish and English too, I like them both; how about yoooouuu?" - There may be times where I want to tell Dora: Put that in your star pocket, sister! But this time she made things all better. And then when I told Girl-Child that her auntie was going to spend the afternoon with her while Mommy spent that time with friends, she spent the remaining hours asking me when I was going to just leave, already. Whatevs. Mood swings.

p.s. My past and present tense is all over the place in here. Thank goodness I'm not turning it in for a grade.

19 comments:

MommyTime said...

Aren't aunties seriously the best? Ours is getting together all manner of fun things for a paper-making project today, and I have high hopes for a solid half hour of eating with not a single solitary soul sitting on my lap. -sigh- Bliss.

PS Congrats on the Classy award. You deserve it.

PPS FIRST comment!

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Yes. Whoever says those gender differences aren't hardwired hasn't had children...

Ann said...

OMG. Ann is: grabbing yellow pages, looking up Fallopian Tube Surgeons, calling Fallopian Tube Surgeon, making appointment for Fallopian Tubes to be tied in Sailor's Knots. Oh, quelle drama!

Jason said...

When my daugher was about your daughter's age, she began---and I kid you not--PMSing. About once a month she would have a big wailing break down and cry about everything under the sun, for like hours. Then she was fine for another 28 days. And now that she's a big girl, well, nothing much has changed.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

My daughter used to feel that way about her brothers too. Then she turned 13.

seachange said...

Tootsie- Reading your stories about your DD makes me want to zap my DD back to her age. I miss that age. Enjoy her, tantrums and all.

PS I say zap because I'm too old to have another. :-)

katydidnot said...

isn't it great to have another chick in the house? i love that about The Girl. that she's a girl, i mean.

Greta said...

See, now in our house, it would more likely go the opposite. Boy child would cry because he would miss his sissy. Weird.

Eve Grey said...

oh so cute. My girl child is 8 & is all like, whatever mom & eye rolling when i annoy her. She practically gives me the hand. Can't wait for 16!

Susan said...

I think my 8yr old daughter had pre-PMS from birth to age 5. I pray, at least. Those years were so hideous - emotionally - that I am thinking it's only uphill from here.

Anyway, what I'm saying is, I get how surprising it is when you're not used to those kinds of reactions! It's like wow, where did that come from? And wait, do I have any wine on hand?

Suzanne said...

Uggg... see, my six year old is one of those little girls who is like that all. the. time. About everything. Please allow me to get all medicated up before those teen years hit...

(although I do find it terribly precious when brothers and sisters are all sweet to each other.)

Indy said...

I don't know if I could handle girls. I have two boys. PMS?????

Colleen said...

how sweet that Girl-Child will miss her guys! and I just want to hug her after seeing that pic...what a little pickle-puss face.

Gavin gets worked up if Cooper isn't going to be in the car with him (because hubby and I split them up so we each can use the HOV lane). After watching my brothers pummel each other, it's kind of refreshing to see how much mine love each other.

Minnesota Matron said...

Dr. College Professor (okay, community college but the doctor part is true) Matron has on her reading glasses and picks up the grade book:

"Tenses? Prose? Saucy. A +."

HRH said...

This is so funny and makes me so happy that testosterone rules around here.

I loved the ps.

Nap Warden said...

Yep, I have one of those!

JCK said...

You LUCKY girl, getting the weekend to just your girlselves. Sounds like fun. And great that Auntie came by, too. Even GREATER (lacking vocabulary this evening) that loud guitars and such were AWAY from you.

We just got back from a whirlwind visit to my mom's where GIRL got lots of attention from Aunts and Uncles. She also had major tantrums. Of which, I would rather just...not discuss. I would want your empathy after all. ;)

mommypie said...

I SO hear you. My four-year-old has suddenly, seemingly overnight become a total CHICK.

(Which would be really funny if I had a son and not a daughter.)

Susie said...

My sister, who has raised two girls, used to call this "minipause."