Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Even One of our Three Children was Conceived in it

This is the post I should have written yesterday about our trip to Sea World but couldn't because writer's block and fatigue were in me mindz cloggin' me thoughts.

Saturday we drove down to San Diego to spend the day with my brother in law and his family, to celebrate my niece's fourth birthday. My sister in law was going to try and score some tickets from work instead of Costco [everything in their life is from Costco or IKEA] and at final count she scored neither. So it was my AAA card to the rescue when I nabbed a kick ass deal at the Sea World ticket window [note to self: inquire more often about discounts provided by AAA. P.S. Duh].

But back to the drive. Last year, at this time, when we drove down for our niece's birthday party it took us a grand total of five hours. FIVE HOURS! From Los Angeles to San Diego. WTF, traffic? We were two hours late to the party. And pointed and laughed at when we admitted we took the I-5 all the way down. So this time we were against that route and knew we wanted to take the 15 around the back way. Except we didn't know that it was the 15 that we wanted because we didn't check before we left the house because we're stupid adventurous like that. We just knew that there was a freeway out there that we needed and thought we'd manage to find. Our navigation system is totally doing IT with the I-5 and refused to show us any other way. No matter how many times we asked it for an alternate route. And we thought, with our combined IQ's [and overinflated sense of self confidence] that we'd be able to decipher which red squiggly line was the one we wanted. Or were on. [Editor's note: Weaker marriages should not attempt]

Imagine our embarrassment when we took a very long, out of the way route and found ourselves passing Angel's Stadium. Which sits adjacent to the I-5. Wet Match? Meet Dark Cave. Oh, that navigation system. She's a right bitch. However, we managed to get there in three hours. Our personal best.

Then there was Sea World...blah blah... fish... blah blah... whales...awwwww manatees!... dolphins...blah blah blahhhh...kettle corn.

Then it came time for bed. Whenever I sleep over at someone's house I kinda dread bedtime. Because I won't be sleeping in my own bed. Editor's note: I do not have this same problem in hotels, yeah, I don't know why either. But there's just something about sleeping in your own bed...So when you spend the night, unless someone has a guest room, it's usually some kind of makeshift deal like a pullout couch, futon, or air bed. This time it was my nieces brand new big girl bed. From IKEA [not Costco]. It was a little firm, kinda like a soft stone floor, and I woke with an IKEA Swedish induced backache. Or a ryggsmärtor [which might also be a bookcase]. Another contributing factor was probably the 12 by 12 IKEA pillow [I'm sorry, pillow? That was a crepe] that had me all hurty.

Even though it was only one night; I missed the hell out of my bed. Nevermind that our bed is a twenty year old hand-me-down from my parents. I'm sorry, did you just throw up a little bit? It's a damn comfortable bed. In fact, and this is a true story, about seven-ish years ago my mother spent the weekend watching the kids for us and slept in our bed. Only to go home and tell my father that they should get a bed like ours because it was the best sleep she'd ever had. Yeah, he's never let her live that one down. He still tells that story at parties.

32 comments:

1blueshi1 said...

My parents guest bed is my great-grandmother's mattress. It's the most comfortable bed, EVER. My son just went up to visit for a week and has spent a considerable amount of time waxing poetic about sleeping in the "wiggly bed" as we call it.

hulagirlatheart said...

I don't know why they give GPS systems male names like "Tom Tom" 'cause they all act like beyotchy women. Maybe they should be called PMS instead of GPS.

Mekhismom said...

That bed bit is truly funny. This actually reminds me that we need to buy a new bed. Waking up everyday wishing I was at the Westin = Need a New Bed.

Anglophile Football Fanatic said...

I adore my bed. The one thing I got from my car wreck money (the one while 7 mos pg) was my Sleep Number. It's heaven.

texasholly said...

Laughing too hard to typeskdfaskdfj.

Where to start....

The crepe pillow?
The parents bed?
The possible revokation of that bed?
The navigation system...I typed an address into mine yesterday that was supposed to be within a 30 mile radius and it wanted to take me via Detroit. No joke. The real Detroit. Which last time I checked was about a zillion miles from Texas. It probably had me going down the I-5.

calicobebop said...

The bed is where my heart is. Can't sleep worth a flip anywhere else - and that includes hotels and the parent's house. Just not as comfy!

RE: GPS unit - I stopped using mine with the chick started sounded bitchy about "re-calculating."

Amy said...

I know how that feels. After being down here in VA for almost 2 months - I can't wait to get back home to MD to sleep in my OWN bed! Only 11 more days!!

All Adither said...

Yeah, I get all jittery when I don't have my own space too.

MommyTime said...

A good bed is worth its weight in gold. As long as it's not actually made out of gold because ewwwww -- ouch -- NOT comfortable!

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

I had my parent's old mattress for the first 3 years after college. Then it became our guest bedroom mattress, but the only guests we usually get are my siblings and my parents. None of us siblings could get past sleeping on it too much - mostly because we'd make crude comments about avoiding the parent DNA all over it. Just wrong.

KEEP BELIEVING

Marmarbug said...

LMAO! That sounds like my mother. Funny one she is.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

Wow. I think a GPS might be as dangerous as asking a gas station attendant for directions!

seachange said...

I'm sending you some good old fashion road maps of CA for a Christmas present!

That way your mind won't atrophy and you can continue to write these witty posts! :-)

Jennifer H said...

When my dad and his wife visited, they had a Garmin GPS. The voice was a woman, and I was entertained the whole time trying to piss her off by going another way. The voice would say "Recalculating" like she just at a lemon. Hysterical. But I'm easily entertained.

scargosun said...

ryggsmärtor [which might also be a bookcase].

Bwaaahhhh!

Jason said...

This post contains so many nuggets of truth. Like the one about how weaker marriages shouldn't try to follow the alternate route on the GPS. And about sleeping on a soft stone floor. And sleeping in someone else's bed...I'm just like that.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I'm totally with you on the sleeping somewhere else thing.

I'm fine with the bed in the condo we're staying in right now, but the whole lack of proper ventilation and air flow thing is really getting to me!

ALF said...

We spent 5 nights away from home last week. I missed my bed like crazy.

Jamie said...

It's true about sleeping at someone else's house. Me? I'm usually afraid that they will find me sound asleep with my butt all hanging out of the covers.

Andrea's Sweet Life said...

Tootsie, we have a guest house complete with a comfortable bed available for you, should you ever decide to drive North on I-5 for 8 hours. You know, in case that bitch of a navigation system screws up on you again.

Timi said...

I hate staying at other peoples houses. I'm getting old and weird. The last house I stayed at had a foam matterss and I thought I was going die. I sink in and can't move. I looked like something packed in foam ready for shipping. The Hubs had to pull me out the next morning. It was horrible! At least if you stay at a hotel and the bed is horrible you can complain. For the most part it's almost expected that it will be uncomfortable and you are ok with it. At someone's house..........uncomfortable is the same as giving you the raggy towels to shower with! I guess people do that so you won't stay or be too quick to come back????
I too have a hand me down bed from my parents, I have had it for years. The Hubs gave up his expensive uncomfortable bed when we moved in together. Why.........because my hand me down bed was more comfortable!
My dad still says he should have never given that bed to me. He should have kept it.
I feel your pain on the bed situation!

Nap Warden said...

I hate my bed...come to think of it...I hate all beds! I have yet to find a comfortable one (I know, poor me). Maybe I should try my parents bed;)

San Diego Momma said...

Actually, 3 hours to San Diego from LA is not at all bad.
Well played.

And I'm the same with other people's beds. I always imagine bed bugs in them.

As for our bed, we went ahead and got the Westin Hotel "Heavenly Bed," which has now been peed on so many times I cannot in good conscience sleep on it anymore.

Don Mills Diva said...

I just gave my parents OUR old bed - how creepy is that?

anymommy said...

Ryggsmartor - that killed me. I'm still laughing. Truly, hysterically funny.

Eve Grey said...

Oops. Maybe now I won't pshaw my daughter when she complains that her IKEA bed is "as hard as a rock". I just thought she was being all princess and the pea-like.

Limbic Resonance said...

Oh too funny. And, my bad, I just posted something that had Costco in it. :)

Our bed was my husband's, it's a Kings Down and it is heaven. When I first visited his place after we met, he "had" to show me his new bed. Turns out, that's all he wanted to do...he was just really proud of the new bed! (Aw shucks, I know)

Minnesota Matron said...

Sigmund? Are you home? Tootsie needs you. . . (but even though she's STILL sleeping in her parents bed, she's funny)

EatPlayLove said...

I think it's time for Tootsie to get a grown up bed. Ikea is wonderful for so many things but beds, I might be right there with you on that one.

Texan Mama@WhoPutMeInCharge said...

Umm, considering the title of the post, I thought you were gonna tell us that your parents like to tell your children that they were conceived in the bed that Grandma and Grandpa used to sleep in and even their own mommy was conceived there too. Boy, what an anatomy lesson that would be!

Swirl Girl said...

as we 'speak' I am in a hotel room in san diego (coronado) and we did sea world Monday and going back for more fishy fun on Thursday.

Two things- 1) don't do SeaWorld after food poisening.. 2) te amo mi Tempurpedic ...

I hate hotel beds (why do they always list to one side.) and am a lousy house guest - I'd just as soon stay home.

Carri said...

Too funny about your bed holding up so well after all these years. They must've spent a mint on it or you have invested in a Memory Foam!

I don't do the staying away from home thing very well either. I prefer my own bed and my own space/routine. I'm kinda anal like that.