Forecast: Slightly Damp With a Chance of Spontaneous Combustion

Sigh...I had planned on doing some Christmas shopping yesterday morning. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays are my only mornings that are child-free; and subsequently, it is my valued "me-time". But I didn't venture out. Wanna know why? Because there was water coming out of the sky and wet stuff on the ground. It's an unusual sight to see here in Southern California but I think I've heard it referred to as "rain". I don't know if you know this about native Southern Californians, but unless it involves soap or a bathing suit; we don't like to get wet. And just an FYI, we don't appreciate being splashed unexpectedly nor do we like having a hose turned on us. We believe that it causes us to melt, or worse(?), large chunks of flesh to fall off our bodies. We won't leave the house unless we can get from point A to point B and remain dry as a bone. We can never find our umbrellas because they are so seldom used that we forget where we stored them. And plus? It's not raining hard enough to clean the dirt off my car. It will just cause spotting. My car is white and dirty polka-dots is an unfortunate look.

We can appreciate rain and you will often hear us acknowledge how much we need it. But we like to watch it through a window. And if it lasts longer than a day we will complain endlessly about it. And can also be accurately diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder; like those folks in Alaska and all their days of darkness, using artificial light therapy.

And another also, contrary to popular belief; native Southern Californians can drive in the rain. It is the transplants from rural parts of the country (and unless you come from a city with a population just under 10 million, you come from a rural location) who become unsure and nervous when they find themselves navigating traffic on the 405, in the rain. Just sayin'...