Ah! Sweet Mystery of Life at Last I've Found Thee...

Our new couch was supposed to arrive Wednesday or Thursday of last week. I knew by the vague language our salesman used, that it probably wouldn't. But, even with a sketchy arrival date; I prepared. I disposed of the old couch and lamp, coffee table, and end table, had the carpets cleaned, and waited. We moved the sofa from the living room into the family room to have somewhere to watch tv sit. I ordered new lamps [and am currently scouring the earth for THE coffee table because suddenly Mr. Farklepants has an opinion about style and home decorating, WTF? Him: "Don't you think the legs are a little too slanted?" Me: "YOU'RE a little too slanted". Him: "What does that even mean?" Me: "What do YOU even mean?" Him: "I can't talk to you." Me: "Go suck an egg." and so on...]. By Thursday afternoon I still had not received a call to schedule my delivery time, so I KNEW that my couch wasn't being delivered that day; and thus began that ever popular game of phone tag. The store was totally "it". When one drops large amounts of cash on some furniture, one expects a certain level of, you know, service. This is not a beginner couch. This is a grown up couch. We've done the "this will do for now" furniture shopping that parents do when the very real possibility of vomit and other bodily functions may make an appearance on their furniture. In other words, in the past we've shopped knowing that whatever we bought would eventually have to be replaced. Sooner rather than later. But we're older now and our kids are pretty much trained to get any disgusting projectile, from whatever end of their body, into a toilet. Thank god. So? We splurged.

I finally get the salesman on the phone and ask, "WTF dude?" and he is a salesman assures me that I will receive my call for my appointment on Friday or Saturday. Did you get that? Not my couch but a phone call is what I would receive. They called on Friday. While I was in the shower. Thus began another round of phone tag and by now I'm kinda over this game. Only to be told that they only deliver Tuesday through Friday. "I guess Tuesday then" is what I said in my extremely displeased tone. "Between 1pm and 5pm?". "Is that my only option?". "Yes". "Then, obviously, I'll take that time slot". Now. Boy-Child#2's school dismissal time is 2:15pm. What do you think the chances of the delivery truck showing up at exactly that time, are? 100% is the correct answer. And do you think you might find it funny that they only have 2 pieces of your 3 piece sectional loaded onto the truck? Maybe not funny-"haha", but somewhere in the realm of comical. And now I'm not only late in picking up my son but they're going to have to come back later with more couch! Lucky for them they stuck some hurry up on it and were back toot sweet. Dudes. That is my life. I'm not even kidding. So, I'll shut up now and show you THE couch! *cue angels singing*



And the sconces! Tootsie is so pleased. Stand by for update on coffee table. Or not.