Thursday, March 20, 2008

Those is My Toes, Ho's...



Hello Spring! Sandals are now an option. There is something so humiliating relaxing about going to the nail spa after a long winter and doing something about those feet that have been hiding in socks and closed toed shoes for so many months. I appreciate a tech who can throw a little muscle into a decent calf and foot massage; allowing me to melt into my chair and not pester me with polite chit-chat. You rock Kim-Ly! I do apologize for not letting you scrape my feet, because why would anyone want something like that to happen? It skeeves me out to think of who and what that barbaric instrument has skinned before me. I. Almost. Can't. Think. About. It. without feeling the need to slather myself in antibiotic creams. So I'm sure you understood when I said that I was sure I didn't want any part of that particular service. Even though you asked twice. I'm also not a "painted flowers on my toes" kinda gal. Yes. I understand they're very "popular" right now, but so are tattoos and tongue piercings and I'm not interested in jumping on any bandwagons. Not that there is anything wrong with any of those things; it's just not me.

When spring arrives, a distinct hormone is released into the atmosphere that causes women worldwide to clean shit out. I'm starting with my purse:


The above are the contents of said purse. Not bad for a smallish bag; although it doesn't explain why I had difficulty locating my keys inside of it. Items which can be discarded:

  1. Yoyo (source: kids' dentist)
  2. Heart shaped slinky (source: kids' dentist)
  3. Lollipop (source: doctor's office)
  4. Three pounds of the four pounds worth of spare change
  5. Three acorns (??)
  6. Umbrella (Los Angeles, CA. March. i.e. useless object 'nuff said)

28 comments:

Cheri said...

Pretty toes!

It's been kind of a hoot lookin' in people's purses with all these purse tags going around.

slow panic said...

the shaving instrument at the pedicure place SCARES me -- and it always takes two or three tries to convince them NO you do not want them to use that thing.

this implies i regularly get pedicures. i love the internet.

A Mom Two Boys said...

Did you just call me a Ho?

jennifer h said...

Pretty toes! I agree, no flowers or rhinestones.

Oddly, I've had acorns in my purse before.

Melissa said...

Love your toes.
The purse is a trap for crap. I hear ya, sister.

Melissa said...

Cute toes, Ho! I knew I liked you for a reason, we have the same umbrella!

Madame Queen said...

I'm wearing open toed shoes for the first time today! Woo hoo! Unforunately I didn't have time to get a pedi beforehand, so I had to do it myself. I think I did a pretty good job, though. But these heels? Good lord they need some work. They're practically hooves.

Allie said...

Yay for flip flop weather. I am so happy it is now spring. I hate the cold. Brrrrrr! I had ice on my windshield this morning - that is totally not cool and not a good way to start off the first day of spring. It better be different tomorrow.

Your toes look lovely!

Jennifer said...

If y'all saw the contents of my purse, you would wonder what the hell is wrong with me.

Let's see...wallet, digital voice recorder, phone, digital camera, moo cards, checkbook, random prescription bottle, birth control pills, headband, pick, starlight mints, change, three different matchbooks (I liked the packaging), can of diet DP, koozie, triscuits, oil-blotting sheets, two kinds of lip gloss, lipliner, lipstick, and a voided check.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I will be doing my own pedicure today--no flowers 'cause I'm just not that talented.

Good thing you have the acorns--you never know when you'll be moved to start growing an oak tree.

Lisa Milton said...

Ho? If I felt an eensy bit better, I might be offended.

Nah. I doubt it.

(pretty toes. Mine are still hiding until the sun shows its face.)

Colleen said...

So I'm guessin' your nail gal still uses that metal instrument of torture instead of a pumice stone/stick? Crazy! I think those metal ones are outlawed in VA or something.

Also, you can make a whistle out of the acorn caps...good for calling the kids or dogs back into the house. At least, that's what I hear.

Shania said...

You gots purdee toes! I got the flower 'cause I'm fancy like that.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Clarification: When I say "Ho's" I mean it like "Girlfriend's". Just like when:

Bad=Good
Phat= You look really awesome
Ho's= my bitches=friends

xoxo

THE MOM BOMB said...

My girls use the pumice stone on my calluses. But what they really need is a sand blaster. And I really need some bunyon removal surgery.

JCK said...

Gorgeous feet. SO friggin' UNFAIR! But, I am WITH you on the foot scraper. Mostly because my feet are then sore for days and I'm pissed. I am overdue for a pedicure. Yes I am...

And, personally, I am QUITE impressed you could fit an umbrella in your purse.

stu said...

Ohh painted toes. We don't see those (or nicely shaved legs) until July here in the Pacific Northwet.....

I can feel my woman getting into that spring "this shit has to go" mood. I feel new towels are in my future soon.

-Stu

Karen said...

Yeah for spring, and a pedi! I've never in my life had one and mostly it's because I"m that ashamed of my feet.

OHmommy said...

I love my Spring/Summer shoe collection!!!! I need a pedi so bad. Cute toes.

OHmommy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Caution said...

I am jealous of the feet. Here in the upper midwest, no bare feet for a good while and now that I pause to look down, wow. Lots of work ahead of me. So I think the first day of spring just got kind of sad here. Don't you wish you could come live in the 3rd gloomiest U.S. city?

anglophilefootballfanatic said...

Is that a Macy's GC? OOH. Sounds fun! And, a few acorns for when squirrels attack. I get it.

Michelle Hix said...

Nice toes! It's that time isn't it? I'm feeling a spa day coming on.

Greta said...

First time commenter, months long lurker.

Ok...to steal a quote from Amy Sedaris..."my toes currently look like laquered corn chips."

I am sooo jealous.

stephanie said...

The toes are very inspiring indeed. And super cute purse! You're very thrifty with the contents (besides the acorns, anyway).

ekb said...

Oooh, pedicures are my favorite. Some days my feet are really ticklish, though, and the pedicurist glares and me when I giggle.

I have the same phone! Yeah for cheapies with no camera!

dkuroiwa said...

Okay...so what IS it about acorns (donguri here in japan)?!?! I checked and found 5 in my bag and many more have been rescued from the wash!!! ("damn kids"!!)
Love the pedi...will do one tonight and take off the "ooh, why are your toes purple"-polish off!!
I...will put on a flower or three...'cause that's what I do!!
Have a great day!!

Don Mills Diva said...

My first pedicure after this weekend alrady has me cringing in shame at the thought - it's not gonna be pretty.

Your look great!